If you have about USD$200,000 and eight months of free time, you can sail with me aboard my ship, visiting six continents (suck it, Antarctica) and 60 countries. We're not able to visit land-locked countries, but nobody cares about them anyway (suck it, Luxembourg).
We left the port of Miami sometime in February of 2020 on an eight-month cruise—I don't know the exact date; I'm not a details person—and have just now docked at our destination, which is the port of Miami. While abroad, I never left the boat. Why would I? I'm the Admiral.
So: did I miss anything?
Actually, I don't care.
While cruising, I have only a few hours of leave each day. I spend this time playing Bruise Cruise with the crew and the obscenely wealthy passengers. I destroy them. It is a fulfilling life.
But I do miss certain aspects of land life. Hanging out at restaurants. Attending concerts and sporting events. Flying in completely full aircraft. Shaking hands.
I'm looking forward to my month off, after which I'll return to my true home: international waters. The cruise industry will live forever.
I will live forever.